


I'm Sorry

by LoverofMidnight



Series: Febuwhump 2021 [10]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt, FebuWhump2021, Gen, Hurt Merlin (Merlin), Hurt No Comfort, I'm sorry i didn't know, Love Confessions, Merlin's Magic Revealed (Merlin), One-Shot, Tired Merlin (Merlin), Whump, Wordcount: Over 1.000, febuwhumpday9
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-10
Updated: 2021-02-10
Packaged: 2021-03-16 17:07:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29335773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoverofMidnight/pseuds/LoverofMidnight
Summary: “I did and for that I am sorry. I now understand that it isn’t always bad.” Arthur trailed off, unsure of what else to say.“How can magic be just bad when it can heal? When it can give life?” Merlin’s voice was tired. He was so bloody tired of hiding what he is.
Relationships: Merlin & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Series: Febuwhump 2021 [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2145546
Kudos: 46
Collections: febuwhump 2021





	I'm Sorry

Arthur was silent as he watched Merlin pace the length of the room. He could feel a headache blooming behind his eyes and for a moment he just wanted complete silence in the room.

“He did nothing wrong and you know it.” Merlin’s voice was low, there was a dangerous lite to the tone that Arthur hated.

“Magic is against the law Merlin.” Arthur couldn’t help but point out, he didn’t want to say that he knows it was stupid but they needed to follow the rules.

“You condemned a father to death because he was trying to feed his family Arthur!” Merlin could feel his magic swirling in his body and trying to find a way out.

“Who is going to make sure those kids eat? Because I know for a fact it won’t be you.” Merlin glared at the prince. He forced himself to take a deep breath.

Arthur was silence as he listens to Merlin’s words, he knows that Merlin had a point, but at this stage, he would rather not go against Uther Pendragon.

And when he gets back and learners that sorcerers were put on trial and not executed them. Arthur couldn’t help but shudder. He doesn’t think he would be able to deal with it.

Merlin stopped speaking, his shoulders slumped slightly as he looked at Arthur, something was nagging in his mind and he couldn’t help but wonder if this is what his future would look like. It was clear that Arthur was against magic.

With a sigh, Merlin turned around and walked from the room.

Arthur sank with a groan onto the floor, his head was pounding but something was nagging at him.

He glared slightly at the floor before he pushed himself upright, he needed more information and there is only one place that he would be able to get it.

The walk to the library was fast.

“Geoffrey,” Arthur called out as he walked into the library. He knows that the man rarely leaves the library unattended so hopefully, he would be able to get the information he needs.

The old man appeared from behind a self, he just looked at the prince. It was rare that Arthur would come to the library.

“What can I do for you Sire?” Geoffrey asked as he put down the book he was carrying.

Arthur was silent for a moment, he knows that Geoffrey is against the destruction of books. So he could only hope and hope it never gets back to Uther.

“I want to find learn more about Socerrer and the crime ledgers for the last few years.” Arthur’s voice was slightly small.

A raised eyebrow made Arthur feel even smaller.

“If I may ask, why Sire?” Geoffrey couldn’t help but be curious, he had always thought that Arthur would follow in Uther’s footsteps.

“The man today, he tried to help his family, he didn’t hurt anyone. Is it then so bad to use magic?” Arthur couldn’t help but wonder out loud.

“Come, Sire.” Geoffrey made Arthur follow him into an adjoined chamber.

Arthur knew if Geoffrey didn’t show him the door he wouldn’t have noticed it. It was simply part of the shelves.

The room was stack with books from floor to ceiling. Geoffrey easily manoeuvred around the books until they got to the back.

There was a large trunk. Geoffrey easily opened it up and pulled a thick tome out. Arthur manages to make some of the words out, but the rest not so easily.

“Sire, you might not know this, but the King and queen had used magic to have a baby. But Uther didn’t listen to the high priestess when she told him that life had to be taken for life to form. She warned him repeatedly that it has to be someone of equal, but Uther didn’t take that to heart.

“He seriously thought that it would be enough for a petty criminal to be executed. As he had learned the hard way, that there is always a cost.

“But magic isn’t evil Arthur.” Geoffrey quieted down when he saw the look on Arthur’s face.

“Then why did so many people needed to die?” Arthur’s voice was lost.

“Because Uther feared and hated magic from that step forward. Don’t be like your father Arthur.” Geoffrey could feel the tiredness from all the years way him down.

Arthur was silent as Geoffrey handed him the tome, his mind felt like it was reeling.

“Thank you, Geoffrey.” With a small nod, Arthur left the room and library. He needed to find Merlin.

Arthur dropped the tome in his room first, making sure that it was hidden away before he went to the south tower. He had seen Merlin disappearing to that side a few times.

When he reaches the top of the tower he almost jumped out of his skin when he saw Merlin sitting on the edge, tears streaming down his cheeks.

“Merlin?” Arthur’s voice was loud in the quiet of the room.

Merlin simply turned his head to look at Arthur.

Arthur was silent for a moment as he looked at Merlin. “I’m sorry.” Arthur could feel his throat tightening up. He didn’t want to tell Merlin about Uther, but he wanted to tell him about his doubts.

Merlin turned around completely to face the prince. “You condemn something, you have no idea about.” Merlin’s voice was low the anger still clear to hear.

“I did and for that I am sorry. I now understand that it isn’t always bad.” Arthur trailed off, unsure of what else to say.

“How can magic be just bad when it can heal? When it can give life?” Merlin’s voice was tired. He was so bloody tired of hiding what he is.

It is time that Arthur knows and then if he wanted to execute him, he can go right ahead. 

Arthur was silent as he tried to form a response, but there is nothing he could say. Merlin only sighed when the silence continued for a few minutes.

A whispered spell, a flash of gold and a frightened squick from Arthur. And a bunch of butterflies were flying around them.

“How is that bad or evil?” Merlin could feel his magic pulsing searching.

Another whisper and flash, and a red and gold dragon were weaving around Arthur’s wrist.

Arthur could only watch in amassment as it twirled around him.

“How is it evil Arthur?” There was a note of panic in Merlin’s voice. He could feel the panic treating to overwhelm him.

Arthur’s eyes where wide. “I- I don’t know. Fuck I’m sorry Merlin.” Arthur’s voice broke slightly. He ran his hand through his hair.

“Tell me, Arthur! Tell me how it is evil.” Merlin’s voice broke, tears fell down his cheeks. He tried so hard to fight it.

Arthur wanted to move forward but something was keeping him rooted to the spot. He could feel the guilt eating at him.

“W-why did you stay?” Arthur’s voice was pained as he looked at Merlin. He wished that he could turn around and ran away.

Merlin could feel something inside him snap inside him. “Because I bloody hell love you.” Merlin voice could feel sobs racking his body as he said it.

Arthur took a step back, his mind felt like it was spinning and he simply looked at Merlin with a dumbstruck look.

For a moment there was only silence in the room before Merlin sprinted passed, Arthur. It took a few seconds before he followed Merlin.

Arthur pulled Merlin against his chest, he could feel the shiver that ran through Merlin’s body.

“I’m sorry Merlin.” Arthur’s voice was hard, he gently spun Merlin around to face him. “I am so sorry.”

“Don’t tell me that Arthur.” Merlin glared up to Arthur. “Do something to change this.” Merlin gave Arthur one last look before he pulled his hand away. Disappearing deeper into the castle.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope everyone enjoyed this one-shot. Please tell me what you think of the story and constructive criticism is welcome.   
> I can also be found on Tumblr @lover-of-midnight


End file.
